In modern society people are stuck. Stuck in the same routines, stuck in the same boring job they have worked for 20+ years and doing the same boring mundane shit and hitting repeat on the cycle or hamster wheel if you will. People have lost their purpose, and are struggling to find any meaning to their lives... It is completely rife.. Furthermore, comfortable being comfortable is the norm and the resistance to change becomes stronger… A society full of people pleasers and adult children who are trying to live up to their parents expectations and standards or way of living. Just ponder this for a second, imagine if we all collectively casted all of that fear, worry, parents/society expectations aside and just started doing what we wanted.. Can you imagine a society like this? It would be pure beauty full of creativity. However, to live this way and to live the life of your dreams involves change. Change such as, changing yourself, your environment, your relationships, your town, your water intake, your diet, your lifestyle, your exercise etc all of these things are what people are changing. This is the resistance. You are resisting change yourself… Why? Because it’s easier to stay where you are. It’s even easier to stay as who you are. Change was something I was never accustomed to either, I was very much set in my ways whether good, bad or ugly and it was very hard for me to change for a very long time until 2020..
For me, most of my early twenties involved drinking, partying, sleeping around, working a job I liked but didn’t love, staying in the family home and doing the same boring mundane shit year in year out. This cycle wore me down. Deep inside I was craving something more meaningful and purposeful. As I have often written and spoken about, 2020 was the year my life changed forever. I changed my habits, I changed my ways and I changed my life. I set off on a path of self - discovery and self - healing. But the one thing that I didn’t change during this time was my environment. I was still in the family home making these big changes and to a point was still stuck in a routine that was quite the same as previous years. From 2022, until the end of August 2023 I had a goal, a clear vision of what I wanted to do and where I wanted to go. The dream was to live on the Sunshine Coast in Queensland Australia. That dream came true a fortnight ago.. The feeling was incredible and I was definitely riding an emotional high. However, I came crashing down days later as the move got closer. It became very real that I was actually leaving. Not only was I leaving, but I was leaving to move interstate (2 states away), the family home and the place where I spent 29 years of my life. Given the way our subconscious minds work, if you aren’t safe and nothing is familiar, and there is change on the horizon it makes you very uncomfortable. Let me assure you, I was making a big change and I was very uncomfortable. The feelings and emotions that came up during this process were off the charts. Feelings of not being worthy to live here in QLD, sadness, an inner child who was not worthy of such a move, worry, anxiousness, nervousness and self- doubt and self - confidence thrown in as well. I sat in these feelings for a week. They plagued me, I couldn’t find a way out and running away was not an option as it had been for years prior. As you know I was an Olympic sprinter running away from myself or anything hard. Over the course of a few days I found myself back into some old habits and old ways because I was not willing to sit and deal with these emotions head on. After some journaling, self reiki, a pep talk from a good buddy of mine and my brother plus a good cry, I then started the process to deal and let go of all of these emotions. The inner child that came up was a big one for me, this child deemed a move such as this very unfamiliar, very unsafe and not worthy. This younger version of me just needed to be told that he was safe, worthy and enough. He needed to be held, loved and told everything was going to be okay. I sat in my room in the fetal position on the floor and cried for 20 minutes with this child. I was able to hold space for myself and let it all out. Another powerful cry on this beautiful journey. I have had so many. Furthermore, my good habits/rituals that I set for myself such as meditating, exercising, journaling, tanning etc all began to work in cohesion again after a week of not showing up for myself. I learnt the hard way that if you do not show up for yourself or continue your good habits it is very easy to veer off the path. I questioned everything for a week. However, I was able to come to the realisation that I am worthy, enough and safe to not only make this move but also to make it work. I am worthy of living the life of my dreams and most importantly worthy and safe to change.
I am very grateful for my time in Victoria and Bendigo.. I am also grateful for my parents as well. It all provided me with a place to grow up and spend 29 years of my life. I had many memories, good, bad and ugly. I wouldn’t change a single thing about my time there. However, over the last few years I had completely overhauled myself and my life and some of the people in it and change was what I needed to start fresh… I outgrew home and my old town and it was time to move on… I am very thankful I can now embark on the next chapter of my life as I move into my thirties. I am super excited for the future and all of the opportunities, people, places and memories that I will create. What a journey!
If you are about to embark on your journey and it involves change in some shape or form it could be the catalyst for you to be finally free of whatever situation you find yourself in at this present moment. Additionally, you can learn from me and my mistakes. We are all here to learn and no one is perfect. Who would want to be perfect anyway? Just be you. Please reach out anytime, I would love to hear from you, better yet work with you. To help you change and transform into the authentic version of you that you were born to be. Let’s all be the change we wish to see in the world, it starts and ends with us.
Reach out for a free zoom call and let’s work together.
Thank you for reading wherever in the world you are.
Nathan Francis: Youth - Self Sabotage Mentor/Coach.
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